This sometimes comes as a surprise to people, but I’ve always been sort of….unpopular. I was going to say uncool, but I actually think that I’m pretty cool. I mean, I would probably be friends with me. But I’ve always been a bit of an outcast, I’m shy, I don’t command a lot of attention & in general I’ve never had a lot of friends. I wish I could say that I was okay with it, but I’m not…it makes me sad.
This is why it was so heart-breaking when Amelia got up this morning and started crying that she didn’t want to go to school because nobody likes her and everybody picks on her. Yes, I know that every kid has days like this. I know that tomorrow she’ll probably be fine. But today I wanted to take her and protect her and run away to a place where nobody would ever be able to make her feel bad about herself.
I remember being the odd one out because I was the only girl, or the youngest, or the only one who wasn’t related (the danger of living in a small town), or because I lived SO far away from everyone else. It was lonely and sad and it never really got better. Now I see Amelia feeling left out for different reasons….reasons that I never had to think about. It sucks.
Amelia probably WILL feel better tomorrow. She’ll almost certainly fit in a little better next year when she’s in real school. And she’ll have a great mom who encourages her to smile at everyone, even if they don’t smile back.
Maybe I’ll even follow my own advice.